King Arthur Movie Tristan

When I didn't hear from the Prime Minister by the weekend, it was occurring to me that he was going to look elsewhere for Senate talent. Who would have thought the politician that owes the most to the blogging world, and the least to the traditional media, whom are always bitching how much he hates them, would put two members of the latter group in the senate? Seriously Prime Minister, your bread is buttered on the other side.

Ladies and Gentlemen, your 2008 Senate Appointments:


Mike Duffy, host of CTV's Mike Duffy Live
Pamela Wallin, the former host of CTV's Canada AM
Fabian Manning, Former Conservative MP
Fred Dickson, a lawyer
Stephen Green, a former chief of staff to Nova Scotia Premier Rodney MacDonald
Michael MacDonald, a Nova Scotia businessman
Percy Mockler, a former Conservative MLA in New Brunswick
John Wallace, a former Conservative party candidate and lawyer
Patrick Brazeau, the national chief of the Congress of Aboriginal Peoples
Suzanne Fortin-Duplesis, a former MP for Louis-Hebert
Leo Housakos, the co-founder of the Montreal Hellenic Chamber of Commerce
Michel Rivard, a former MNA for Limoilou, Que.
Nicole Eaton, director and vice-chair of the National Ballet of Canada
Irving Gersetein, an Ontario business man and chair of the Conservative Fund of Canada
Nancy Green, an alpine skier
Yonah Martin, a former Conservative candidate in New Westminster-Coquitlam
Richard Neufeld, B.C.'s former minister of Energy, Mines and Petroleum Services
Hector Daniel Lang, a former Yukon MLA

What are the actual qualifications for Senate? you might ask. Here's the list:

The Governor General appoints senators on the recommendation of the Prime Minister. To qualify for a summons to the Senate, the nominee must:

• be a Canadian citizen;

• be at least 30 years of age;

• own $4,000 of equity in land in the home province or territory;

• have a personal net worth of at least $4,000; and

• live in the home province or territory.

Canadian Citizen - check

At least 30 years of age - check and then some

Own $4,000 in equity of land in the home province - check

Net worth of $4,000 - check

Live in Province (Ontario) - check

Prime Minister, my bags are packed I am ready to serve at your leisure.


If you're on facebook, join the group Brian Gardiner for Senate. I figure if I get 50 - 100 people the Prime Minister who swears he wants a democratically elected Senate can hardly ignore such an outcry from the people.

Much like winning an Oscar or a Cy Young Award, to be considered for a Senate seat a person usually has to wage an internal campaign for their red velvet chair. With that in mind:

why should I be a senator?
Let me count the ways...

I have a degree in economics.

I earned my degree while working full-time, shift work. Over much of the time I was doing my university work, I was working 48 hours a week and had two infants/toddlers at home. I understand the struggle people have to get ahead and I'm not afraid of work.

On the other hand, if you think that makes me overqualified for Senate work, I'm a lazy autoworker.

I could play guitar, acoustic or electric, lead or rhythm, bass and/or mandolin in the Senate band.

The blogging community is under-represented in the Senate.

The government is about to hand billions of dollars to the auto industry, shouldn't there be someone in some capacity within government who's actually been on the floor of an auto assembly plant?

I can multi-task (see above)

The Senate is a chamber of sober second thought; upon sobering up I often have second thoughts.

I'm computer literate (everybody puts this on their resume).

It would drive Buzz Hargrove nuts seeing a CAW member not named Buzz get the job.

***************

Update: Phantom Observer makes a point: excluding grammar (and speeling),  I have written nothing on this blog that is indefensible.  

Welcome to the race Chucker Canuck

Prime Minister.

Since it looks like you are going to be appointing a number of Senators in the next month, I thought I'd throw my hat into the ring. You see, I work for Chrysler, so it seems likely I will need a job soon. Don't think of it as patronage, think of it as one less auto worker on EI. But, of course you ask, why me?

Well, Mr. Harper.... Stephen... Good buddy...

First, consider it repaying a favour. You see, it was I who got you your present job in the first place. As I pointed out then:

Back in November when the election was called, you sat at 28%-30% in the polls, a full 10 points behind Mr. Martin. On December 8th, I began "At Home in Hespeler", and soon thereafter your fortunes began to rise. ... Stephen, Mr. Prime Minister, Sir, it wasn't until I got in the game, and I got comfortable and found my blogging voice that your numbers improved. Today, you are the Right Honourable.

And then there's all the advice I have provided:

Well since the CBC, Dalton Mcguinty, David Miller and a cabal of detractors feel entitled to give you advice, so shall I. If you are smart you would print it out, take it to the P.A.M.S. Coffee outlet in Lincoln Fields Shopping Centre. Throw in a couple of bucks and you'll be good for a White Chocolate Mocha Latte, which is truly excellent on one of those cold Ottawa winter days.

I trust you enjoyed your coffee.

Lets not forget that we are old friends you and I. When we met, I didn't bother you with pesky questions about policy, about Arctic Sovereignty or Free trade, I enquired about the family. (Took some heat for that too, but what am I supposed to ask in thirty seconds?)

Anyway Stephen... Steve. I might just need a job, and you might just have a job, seems like a good fit. I have worked 20 years in "the real world," showing up for work rain or snow. I'll not embarrass you by not coming to work. I even like Ottawa.

So Mr. Prime Minister, return a favour here, and consider At Home in Hespeler for a senate seat.